Day 29: Adventure
When things are going down I have a little secret habit of buying a lottery ticket. It salves my wound of feeling powerless in the world. At one time I had a regular subscription set up to nurse the supperating hole it created but a wise friend who was helping me with my finances quite rightly pointed out that it was creating a different kind of leakage. So with the exception of feast days and special occasions I dont buy lottery tickets anymore. One could argue that yesterday, the eve of Easter was a feast day, but that is not what prompted me to splash out rather it was an action from an intuitive coaching session. An action so clear and yet so simple, it brought up a rush of feelings and resistance. I didnt want to go out in the cold evening air and I only had £1.63 in my wallet and just one entry would cost me all of £2 but I have learnt the power of taking intuitive action.
Normally I ask for a lucky dip but in the shop it was obvious that I had to choose the numbers. Somewhere inside me a headless chicken was let loose; flushing out the thought that I could revel in my expertise if I won but would only have myself to blame if I didnt. 3 voided entry forms later I let go of my rational mind and submitted a selection with trepidation. As soon as I saw I had picked 3 numbers between 20 and 30 I felt as if I had put all of my eggs in the one basket failing to spread my risk. This morning I discovered that no only did I fail to nail one of the numbers but that the winning selection had 3 numbers between 30 and 40.
This morning I was also prompted to look up the word ADVENTURE. I aspire to advenure, I want it to be part of my life and my business. I have a sense and an essence of it, it speaks to me of travel, new horizons, pioneering, the unexpected. What I had not appreciated is that the word adventure comes from the middle English aventure meaning to risk the loss of. The lottery ticket was a mini experience of being an adventurer, my risk was low but it revealed the machinations of my unconscious mind. It was an action that allowed me to embrace the reality of loss and separate myself from the meaning I make up about it. A reminder that I only receive life when I step into it. In that space I may win some, I may loose some, failure is inherent but I dont have to buy into the suffering that it means anything about me. This is knowledge that allows me to move through failures, loss, f*&kups, to let things go from my sub conscious mind clearing the way to step into life again and again.
100 Days of Awe is a playful project I set up to bring my attention to awe in my daily life. I see awe as wonder, a mixture of amazement and respect. I expect the experience of awe to be about perception shifting awareness and that demands a reframing of some sort. I am excited to see what will awe me on this journey.
Anne K. Scott is an imagination technologist, her work to teach, facilitate and deliver innovation for individuals and business. She is the creator of FindYourMojo a FREE iPHone productivity app. If you are interested in what intuitive coaching can do for you please do contact me. I support clients all over the world.