Category: Intuitive Living


Finding Faith

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Unicorn in Inverness

Faith is a deeply mystical word, associated with religion and divinity.   The dictionary definition of faith is a strong or unshakeable belief in something, especially without proof or evidence. I am respectfully in awe of those who stand stoic and strong in the face of life’s turbulence anchored by something unseeable beyond reason.  I have pondered faith for myself and as a lapsed Irish Catholic have a niggling sense that perhaps I have mislaid my token to pass through the gates of Heaven.  I am a doubter and a questioner, I like to grapple with concepts and ideas, turn them over and upside down, try them on for size.  I love the metaphor of the Bible, the hero’s journey of Jesus, the symbolism for my life but the one size Catholic hat doesnt work for me.  I like to bring my own style to bear.

I was triggered today to rethink my position on faith when I read the commentary of  Judge Thomas J. Troward on Romans 14:23 in his gem of a treatise on The Spirit Of Opulence. “Whatsoever is not of faith is sin” – he expands on faith as “not in accordance with our honest belief” and I have long been curious about the words “sin” and “evil” being Aramaic archery terms; sin meaning off the mark and evil being where that off target arrow falls [1].

Now my understanding of a belief is as a thought that through repeated thinking has worn a groove in the sub conscious mind over time.  The creation of beliefs is innately human, formed from childhood, they become deeply buried driving us to live unconscious lives playing out patterns to prove and further anchor our beliefs.

So if we all already believe then we already have faith! Perhaps the question becomes one of what we believe in versus what we want or believe we should believe in.  If the archer does not receive and act on the feedback from his sin to adjust his aim he will continue to be off the mark amplifying the tension of that sin and the angst of doubt.  If we do not see the truth of what we honestly believe in they there will always be dissonance between what we want to have in our lives and what we actually create in our lives.  So the journey seems to me not to be the one of finding faith outside ourselves, working out how others get their faith or why they believe in what they do but about seeing the faith we already have that is flawlessly creating the reality we experience.  When we uncover these beliefs then we can see how they serve us and where they dont we can consciously choose to take the power out of them and reframe our faith to hit the target of what we truly love and create the impossible, the magical.

Anne K. Scott uses intuitive coaching tools & the technology of imagination as an integral part of her work to reveal underlying beliefs that get in the way of the faith we seek to create the lives we would love.

Taking potshots

Larry Ellisons Tender

Larry Ellison’s little tender Marina Del Rey, Los Angeles*

I feel ill, sick, unwell.  In the space of moments I have established a scenario that reveals a flash of anger and destruction on someone else’s parade.  It comes at me left of field, the situation is innocuous, an inoffensive Facebook photograph, a caption and then an unexpected thought, one that at any other time would have slide down the inner sewage groove and never have been revealed. This time however I am curious about it, as a child would be curious about a worm or a wood lice, a snake or a scorpion. Where did that come from, what does it mean, what does it do?  Can I play with it? The enter button is pressed and there it is out in the world for all to see.

At the beginning of 2014 I consciously chose to change my reality. After 5 decades I am over struggling for survival, being alone and sabotaging my creations. I can feel the hairs lift on the back of my neck as the reality I am creating on Facebook unfolds and I consider that if you cant make an omelette without cracking an egg then perhaps this choice to create a new reality requires me to face up to and own deep seated unconscious patterns that have been keeping my old reality locked in.

Step back with me a moment to 5 years ago.  I had been working for over 30 years in the business of information technology running the gamut of jobs and roles.  I had created the freedom of being a contractor with big bucks, low responsibility, home working.  I sat on the fence of committment; basking in the illusion of my own authority but actually beholden to the behemoths of industry for my survival.  Swinging from intense periods of focused work and filthy lucre to extended fuges of amorphous travel and well heeled shoe string living.  Every now and then I would think there has to be more to life than this. By my mid 40s the soothing murmer was morphing into a demanding thunder and as I am discovering the journey of change pivots on critical moments.  In this case a simple email invitation to come learn about my intuition.

5 years on I have learned that intuition serves the agenda of the heart, a broader and more multi-dimensional agenda than that of the ego and our need for survival.  I have revelled in learning this new language and the paradox of it that no matter how long you have been on the journey, there is always the joy of deeper heart connections married with the anticipation of new learning.

I have just spent two days immersed in a shamanic realm** deliberately designed to till the soil of the sub conscious mind; digging out deep seated gnarly roots, loosing up the secret underground network of matted brambles, aerating the soil, freeing fat, slimy globules of wriggling worms that are as equally fascinating and as they are repellent.  Itt is no surprise then that in my deep overnight sleep I watch this metaphor play out as I step back into my old world and see how the old me maintains the status quo.  An innocous comment about Larry Ellison, the enigmatic CEO of Oracle a giant of a company that was foundational for me in my technology days and a man who I dont know or have never met turns out to be fertile ground to reveal seething worms of anger in the glare of daylight.  Like a child my focus has gone on to them eager to play and share.  In my innocence I embrace what I have not seen, what in my fear I have been resisting.  Decades of old anger sitting there on the surface of the earth and sitting there on a Facebook post.  Nothing to do with the Facebook post, nothing to do with Larry Ellison and nothing to do with the photograph celebrating this sleek, beautiful marvel of sailing design, Larry’s boat, that I thought to key scratch.

I dont know what I know, but I know what I know is made up and what I make up serves to create the reality I experience.  Now that the anger is no longer hidden and I choose to be curious about it I see I have been avoiding shame, embarrassment, rejection. I see my covert reaction to masculine authority, I see the destruction of my temper, the rage of my powerlessness and my anger at and judgement of my father, the foil against which I made up all that I believe to be true about men and me in relationship to men.  I want to hide, I want to cry to turn back the clock and pretend that it never happened.  I want to smooth over the earth, to hide all of those ugly worms under a nice smooth slab of concrete adding to the paving stones that have smothered this fecund, fertile garden.  I want to put my flowers in neat pots to smile and say that it is all good.  And that is what I do on Facebook as I fiddle with comments but still my focus goes back to the key scratch until I cannot ignore that putting my focus on what I believe it bad and wrong about me and what I do only creates a reality that perpetuates that.

I am caught on the ledge of a slippery slope, a moment to breathe, to acknowledge the pain of this reality that I have created for myself and ask my heart what would it love.  In that space there is no question – I want to reclaim my garden, to grow creations that nourish my heart, body and soul.  I want to step back and allow in the natural forces that rise to support me; to honour the powerhouse composters that enrich and condition the soil as they eat their way through it, marvel at nature’s pollinators as rediscover and seed the richness of my creations.  What is obvious is to allow the worms to wriggle, to be with the discombobulation of bringing this garden back to its natural state and to focus on the work to do that. In this moment I am flooded with gratitude for the strong powerful men who have revealed to me the groove of that old story I have about the masculine; my father and the love he had to bring me into being, Larry Ellison for creating a company that taught me much of what I know about information technology, to Mark Zuckerberg for creating the platform to play this out this scenario, to Darren Eden, an intuitive master who is committed to transforming hearts through the creation of shamanic realms of learning and to William Whitecloud, who posted the picture that drew me into the ring of a psychic master whose wise foil refused to collude with the old me.  It doesnt make sense to my rational mind but intuitively it is obvious that this story keeps me separate from the love and intimacy of a man in my life.

*  Photograph with kind permission of William Whitecloud

** Darren Eden’s Your Call To Greatness workshop, Central London www.academyofgreatness.co.uk

Travelling Faster Than The Speed of Light

DYG Cover Image_19Feb13In 2008 I had been working for over 30 years in the business of information. I had created the freedom of being a contractor with big bucks, low responsibility, home working, swinging from intense periods of focused work and stashing money to extended adventures across the world  of amorphous travel and spending money.  Every now and then I would think there has to be more to life than this. By my mid 40s the soothing murmer was morphing into a demanding thunder and as I am discovering the journey of change pivots on critical moments; in this case a simple email invitation to come learn about my intuition.

I have learned that intuition serves the agenda of the heart, a broader and more multi-dimensional agenda than that of the ego and our need for survival.  I have revelled in learning this new language and the paradox of it that no matter how long you have been on the journey, there is always the joy of deeper heart connections married with the anticipation of new learning.

5 and a half years on from Darren Eden‘s first 3 day event in Central London and the roller coaster ride of screaming lows and gasping highs I have just been full circle at the latest incarnation of this workshop a sleek, mean love hugging machine. Superbly engineered, deftly managed and subtly delivered material. It may look like the same workshop but I am in a different place in time and space & I think I have just switched into warp speed, bitten into the next layer of the this fruit cake and ratcheted up the roller coaster ride.  Watch this space!

* Darren Eden is the founder of The Academy Of Greatness in the UK and author of the book Discover Your Greatness. His two day weekend Your Call To Greatness is an introduction to intuitive mastery and his 8 month training The Transformation gives you the structure to be an intuitive master in your own life.

The Way That I Choose

girl leprechaun 2I love the intuitive coaching work that I do, it is never a chore, rather always a pleasure to take a purposeful ride on my magic carpet.  Part of my learning has been to hold the tension of giving away sessions and casting my pearls before swine.  It is not that everyone hasnt got a heart and isnt at their core deeply imaginative and creative but unless they are open to a guide in that moment the seed may find itself in barren soil.  When I realised this my ego went into overdrive to try and work out ‘how’ it would be possible to discern the worthy from the unworthy, the open from the closed, those who would take action from those who wouldnt.  What a muddle.  I know I am always ready to take that ride so the key is to see who is willing to cross that threshold to meet me.  People’s willingness to pay is one way to judge that but it is not the only way.  I choose to listen to a deeper beat and know that money is not the only gold that is there for me on this journey.

This past week has revealed two beautiful testimonials from clients who didnt cross the threshold in the traditional way.  Lauren, whose journey and testimonal I shared in my last blog, won a session in my monthly FindYourMojo competition and Ronan, a chance meeting while on holidays in Ireland in 2012 just asked straight up for a session.  Ronan is Ronan Stone (dont you love the play on words!) a singer, song writer, writer, lover of words who has struggled with his place in the world.  He didnt have any money to offer but his request was so direct and true that there was nothing to do but grab a coffee at T Bay Surf Cafe and unhitch that carpet.

Within a couple of days of our session he wrote to thank me and say he had been racking his brains to find something to ‘pay’ me for it.  Really all he had to offer was a song.  I cannot tell you how wonderful it is to receive a song as a testimonial, I wont deny I dont get excited when I receive money, but Ronan’s song was a gift of gold straight from the soil of his heart.  That would have been enough but yesterday he sent me a full recording which I attach here.  I feel like the leprechaun at the end of the rainbow.

So it is a big thank you to Ronan Stone for the smile he puts on my heart when he sings this song.

The Way That I Choose.

I travelled far and wide looking for the muse
looking through this big bad world for significant clues
everytime i find an answer its steeped in the blues
now i see so clearly thats the way that i choose

so what next now that i see my way through
i think i have the answers but i feel like some kind of fool
these opposed perspectives they break each other’s rules
one way or the other its up to me to choose

from where I’m standing from my point of view
its all so clear now where before it was confused
i’m not saying that this way is for you
I’m just saying its the way that I choose

*** SPECIAL OFFER ***

Although I have discontinued my monthly FindYourMojo competition Ronan’s experience has inspired me to offer a big reduction for one off FindYourMojo coaching sessions to kick start the year.  Normally £150 I am offering sessions for £50 if booked before 31 January 2014.  You will need access to an iPhone or iPad to download the FindYourMojo app from iTunes, following the instructions to find your two word MOJO and then email it to me below.

Are You Willing To Play the Game?

I am proud to present Lauren Ackermans first blog. Lauren found my FindYourMojo iphone app, discovered that her mojo is Laughing Life and by posting this on my Facebook page won a free coaching session to dive more deeply into what this could mean for her and how she could make it real in her life. So across the miles we unwrapped this beautiful package to discover the simplicity and joy of play and her gift to live this in her life showing others how to live it too. As we talked it became obvious to Lauren to give herself the gift of creative writing and from that action she has created her blog HopScotch Through Life and has signed up for a blog challenge to keep her on track. Knowing your mojo is one thing, bringing it to life is quite another. It takes will and action. Congratulations Lauren on a great start!

“It’s alive!!”—My new tip for making beautiful things happen

I love Pam Grouts book E-Squared – if you want to be a master of invisible forces go get it.  She shares a simple tip in this blog to get things to happen.  On the surface it looks like the Law Of Attraction and how many of us have got that shit (excuse my French) to work?!  I can tell you the reason why it works for Pam is that she believes what she writes before she writes it, she is open to create the impossible, and to be Abraham Hicks about it she is a vibrational match  to what she is asking for, she is also very clear on her higher purpose to share what she has discovered so that we can all too benefit from the power of the force.

I have tried this kind of asking before and for a long time dismissed the idea that it was possible but more recently I am getting glimpses into the mastery that is required to step into this kind of asking.

The first thing I now ask myself is what I am seeking my highest truth or is it about feeling good, being in the in crowd, being important or significant or is it really something that serves my unique essence.  It can be challenging to tell the difference.  As an intuitive coach I am fortunate to have the skill and the tools to dive deeper into my choices to check their validity but you can start to do this just be listening to what you are asking for and being truthful about your motivation.  There is a difference between the ring of truth and the ring of bullshit and the more you check in the easier the distinction becomes.

The second trick is to get into the emotion of having what you are asking for.  To quote a master I know this IS the secret weapon.  This is where I am a little more challenged as a very rational and perhaps an under emotional being but you know I have fun with this.  I go to sleep what would it feel like to have already created a powerful set of soul based coaching apps or to see my book published.  Little by little I am feeling it and when I feel it I am informed of the next step to take to actualise it.

Ao here is to Pam Grout “It’s alive!!”—My new tip for making beautiful things happen.

What is going on?

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I am conscious of a seething unhappiness which drives me to work out what is wrong with my world.  It has been there for weeks, no – for a lifetime. Like the high pitch static of tinnitus it can be cloaked by the noise of life’s traffic but in the spaces in between it lurks, a superating wound.

As I have chosen to extricate myself from the routine of employment and material stuff over the past three years it has created the freedom to commit to my life; a freedom to explore the world, to rove and write, to create an iPhone app, to dive into my imagination and wield it purposefully, to prioritise connection, community and friendship and to create.  There are moments of exhilaration and contentment but there are times like this when the void opens and I am disorientated, I dont know what matters anymore.  And something has to matter – right?  In my struggle to make something matter I realise that I am resisting the reality that nothing matters.   If nothing matters what is the point?  Why bother?  I am shrinking from the world, disappearing into inertia, as I try to hold back my bile of discontent I become more tense, jagged and brittle.  I dont know what to say only what I should say. I am glad for my friends who everywhere I turn are awesome creative machines; a conveyor belt of babies, manifesting sexy, intimate partners out of the woodwork, new homes in nature, stringing words together to make novels or simply going with the flow of their journies knowing that if nothing matters then anything can matter and what a joy that is.

But I dont feel joy. Like a worm I wriggle on the hook of my dilema; the desire to know truth and feel good at the same time.  A wise man once told me that living intuitively is not about feeling good, the shock of that paradox is a scar that reminds me I cannot hide from the truth of my motivation around the choices I make.  The temptation to seek the salve of a good feeling is there but as I inch my way along this tight rope of life I know that to draw sustenance from the sugar of what is in easy reach is a posion. I can try and persuade myself that any number of things from the glass of wine or a Snickers bar, to making Christmas cards and shopping for Christmas presents are harmless if not really good things to do.  If I do anything purely for the relief of feeling good then I just fuel this sluggish fat grub to dawdle dangerously above the chasm of calamity. Equally it is true that even creating this as a dilema is a strategy to procastinate yet again, to stagnate and purtrify.

I struggle to see the truth of where I am, clouding it with the innate need to compare the facts with failure against the past and the future; my tangible creations are invisible in the womb of my heart, how long is this pregnancy? I am the elephant of creators – with an extra long gestation?  Or am I invisible to my creations just because they are not not manifest in a material vibration?  I am afraid that they will miscarry bleeding my essence into the earth, I am afraid they will manifest and condem me to thankless motherhood. I am just afraid and when I am afraid I get angry and when I get angry I get depressed.

I can only imagine I am like the surfer in post coital pause, as the wave breaks to shore carrying the rider away from the adrenaline rush of the cavorting ocean and the raggle taggle bunch of wave catchers where the action happens.  I can yearn to be back out there and fret about my choice to ride this particular wave or I can just be with the ebb and the flow of being a surfer.  Being in the moment that I am in, dealing with the here and now. I am no less a surfer with my back to the ocean or buffing my board than I am when I am riding the unfurling edge of a monster breaker.

I love the space where the earth meets the sea

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Tramore Bay

I grew up in the space where the earth meets the sea in Tramore, Co. Waterford in Ireland.  I love this space and am drawn to it wherever I travel.  This time last year I was in California in the romantically named Half Moon Bay looking west across the Pacific Ocean, being filled to expansiveness in the space where the earth meets the sea.  This is what I wrote:

Early in 2009 I was introduced to the concept of living my life intuitively and establishing goals created from my imagination. This blew my mind; intuitive choices are not SMART goals. They are often not specific, far from measurable, as to attainable, realistic & timely well I had brain freeze when my imagination advised me that I wanted to be a global warrior of discovery leading the way and connecting people through the warmth of technology. What the bleep!…..! Almost four years on I feel exactly like a global warrior of discovery. I now create choices as New Year resolutions and wait to see them manifest just by gentle consistent action to connect with each choice intuitively.

As of February 2012 I have been on the road, following the breadcrumbs to live and work a life guided by my heart. In the past 5 months I have been sailing in the San Blas Islands in Panama, collecting shells on the freezing shoreline of Satellite beach in Florida, sipping coffee overlooking the chilly surf in Ireland and today I have just walked the Half Moon Bay coastal trail in California. I dont tell you this to impress but rather to illustrate the penny dropping of a choice created intuitively. I love the space where the earth meets the sea. This choice has effortlessly being manifesting in my life almost unbeknownst to me. Lovely lyrical wording that at a logical level sounds like I love the shoreline but putting it like that underestimates my journey and the experiences I have had. I notice that I am drawn to walk along the shifting line where the sea tickles the land; I love the treasures that are found there and tell tale trail of ocean detritus that mark the segue of the tides but there is so much more.

I recollect that one of my favourite distractions in school was my geography homework. I was particularly drawn to maps and to drawing maps using a rainbow selection of coloured markers to artistically mark out where land masses and bodies of water came together. I would get lost in these creations to the detriment of less inspiring subjects such as physics or chemistry. My submissions were works of art. At the time I had no idea why I was so compelled to pour so much love into such a narrow activity. Now I make up that I had a deep knowing that there was something about that space that opens up inspiration and creates energy for me.

When I am tired or overwhelmed being by the ocean calms me, sleeping on the ocean soothes me, sailing the seas expands my mind, distracts me from the rational and steeps me in my imagination. I am always refreshed, energised and thinking expansively after a spell by the sea. I am rushed by the wild chaotic femininity of the sea and the steadfast masculine anchoredness of the land, I love the fusion of these two forces at the shoreline each bringing their own gifts together to create a space that is a child born of the two. Whether looking at a map, hunkering over a magical tide pool, drinking in the San Mateo hills, watching kite surfers dancing around the jagged tooth Maverick rocks, being tricked by warm sun & cold breezes, ear wigging on conferences of gulls or buzzed by macho pelicanos there is magic in this place. I am not alone in my fascination with this space – there is a nebulous yearning that rivets many of us to Coast, the magnificent BBC TV creation now on its eighth series, which exquisitely charts life in the space where land and sea come together.

Today I was filled to overflowing with a knowing that goes beyond understanding that where the earth meets the sea opens up doors for me that are foundational to living the fullness of the life I love. I am ready to sign off on the creation of this choice and embed it as a fundamental underlying structure in my life. No longer is visiting the sea a nice to have in my life it is a basic necessity and I am looking forward now to diving deeper into that space by creating a new choice to lead me to more discovery.